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Posted: January 31st, 2022

Flushed

I blush quite a bit. When somebody compliments me or a stranger approaches me, I do know precisely what they’re . They’re watching my face develop the shade of a sunburn from the Sahara Desert. They’re watching as each single erythrocyte in my physique floods to my cheeks, rushes round my nostril, and fills my brow. I think about it’s like watching a glass fill with tomato juice. The one distinction being, I’m the glass. I’m a really, very clear glass.

For so long as I can keep in mind, the slightest trace of flirting, a praise, or assembly somebody new has at all times painted my face a really apparent shade of purple. And it was crippling.

Particularly after I bought to highschool, I might maintain again from introducing myself to new individuals or beginning a dialog with a cute boy or wanting somebody within the eye as they mentioned one thing variety and flattering.

I didn’t need them to get the improper vibe from the method of my face turning the lovable shade of an Exit signal.

I’m not even a shy individual. I’m not socially awkward; I simply blush quite a bit. I like volunteering at school, studying out loud, and conversing with new individuals once we’re given group assignments, however I don’t love that I seem like I’m working a marathon whereas doing so.

My senior yr introduced me with superb alternatives. I began an internship the place I carry sufferers into examination rooms and ask them questions on their well being, take their very important indicators, and put together them to be seen by their doctor. I took a category referred to as Honors Superior Writing, the place sharing essays out loud was required. I additionally began to get a modest quantity of consideration from native sports activities web sites, the place I used to be interviewed about my crew and our success.

These alternatives compelled me to confront my blushing head on. There was no method I used to be going to let this internship slip by way of my fingers as a result of I used to be apprehensive about giving a affected person a bizarre vibe. So what if I used to be blushing whereas taking their pulse?

I wouldn’t permit myself to do poorly in Honors Superior Writing resulting from worry that the category would decide me if I blushed whereas studying my essay. That’s my GPA we’re speaking about!

And it could be so petty of me to say no interviews for my crew as a result of I used to be embarrassed of blushing on digital camera or in entrance of the interviewers. I wasn’t going to let a couple of million purple blood cells – nevertheless embarrassing they could be – hinder my development and studying.

I dove into all these highschool sports activities interviews with a vermilion face as a result of I used to be proud to indicate off my crew and our athletic success.

I took all these sufferers’ blood strain whereas my very own skyrocketed and requested all of them about their rash ointment as a result of I need to be a nurse.

And I learn all of my Honors Writing essays out loud in entrance of my classmates as a result of I care about my grade.

As a freshman I might keep away from any hallway which may comprise a gorgeous male, to spare myself the transformation from lady to pomegranate-with-limbs. Now when guys introduce themselves to me, I simply say, “I’m Shannon, and I blush quite a bit.” Some snicker. Others inform me it’s cute, so I blush some extra and begin a dialog so that they don’t assume I’m blushing as a result of I’m shy.

Sure, I nonetheless blush on a regular basis, however due to the alternatives I’ve had throughout my senior yr, I’ve realized to by no means maintain again due to worry or fear that I will likely be judged for it.

Moreover, everybody loves a pure glow.

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