A Winding Road

I sat in my mom’s closet, gripping the letter that had so quickly snuffed out any hope of my attending the most prestigious private school in our county. Moments earlier, my parents had handed me the letter, gingerly delivering the blow that I could not attend because I had not performed well enough on the scholarship test. A wave of emotion washed over me; the only rational action seemed to be to retreat into my mom’s walk-in closet, where I sat in the dark among old comforters, sniffling and pitifully erasing any dreams I had of attending the high school that I was convinced would sate my academic appetite. My mind automatically flashed back to all of the resources and programs the school offered: engineering, an architecture studio, and nationally ranked broadcasting, pre-law and pre-med programs. The abundance of unfulfilled possibilities taunted me. I emerged from the closet that day disheartened and with a wounded sense of self-esteem.

On my first day of public high school, I looked around, wistfully letting go of the image I had created of my high school career. Although the public school is three times larger than the private one, I was determined that I would not be just another face in the crowd. Known for being shy, I was resolute; I would force myself out of my comfort zone and get involved. During that first week of school, my AP Geography teacher, while taking attendance, said, “Sydney…now that’s a name suited for class president.” A spark ignited in me at that moment as I thought, “Yes, you’re right,” and as they say, the rest is history.

Now, I walk around my school, seeing not only people I consider family, but endless opportunities just waiting for me to take advantage of them. I have found sources of inspiration in the teachers who so enthusiastically and unknowingly encouraged me to rebound. My chemistry teacher opened my mind to the possibilities in the world of science and encouraged me to apply to a selective summer program that I attended last summer. My English teacher and I bonded over our love of Jamaica, and she was integral to my submitting a district-winning essay on our country. I have acquired a colorful pallet of perspectives from my peers, who consistently challenge and motivate me. Empowered, my shyness began to slip away: I became active in my school and my community, speaking in front of city leaders and hundreds of citizens. The tools I have acquired in my time at Everglades have been both tangible and intangible, and the effort I have had to put in to attain them has taught me that the road to success and happiness can take different forms for everyone.

In some ways, I believe I have learned more from my failure to achieve a scholarship to my dream school than I would have had I attended. My subconscious sense of entitlement was only revealed to me after the blow to my ego. With that awareness has come a willingness to work hard not for the prestige or the acclaim, but instead for the value of the work itself. My love of learning for the sake of learning was revitalized, and that could only happen after my status-based goals had been done away with. It was only in my disappointment that I left the box in which I had formerly kept myself confined. My accomplishments thus far have been framed in the context of what I once considered my greatest failure. I have learned that sometimes, if you are fortunate enough to let life take the reins, your reality can turn out better than the path you once imagined for yourself.